Friday, 29 March 2013

Dear, I'm No Longer Happy :(

People always leave.

Dear, Im no longer happy. No longer see to love any guy in this world anymore besides special persons in my life. No longer see to make a relationship with someone. It's hurt. Now I realized I lost my heart to someone who doesn't care and lastly I found it is crying. I fell in love with the wrong person I think. I'm going to smile and make others think i'm happy. When first time know you, It's amazing how a person who was once just a stranger, can suddenly mean the world to me. but it's almost a few years since I last saw you. bout a few years since you disclose by saying that you are no longer in love with me.

No matter how hard I try to get over you, I will still have some sort of feeling for you, remembering the ways things used to be, and how you are now. And I sometimes hope that the new person in their life was still you, and everything was how it used be, erasing all the bad things that happened. Time is supposed to make things better, but in love it doesn't. Although we have been apart for a while, and now have diferent loves in our life, I stil can't help wondering how your life is, and when I catch you glancing at me, I can't help but wonder if your heart beats a little faster, as mine does when I see you.
I can't stop thinking about you and your new girlfriend who I'm so jealous of, and it hurts so bad. Every time I see both of you talk on Facebook or whatever I die a little more inside. I want to text you, or talk to you, or see you once again.

What i can say is that no other guy has ever made me feel the way you did. I felt so complete when we were with each other. It was so amazing. I just wish you would come back to me. I literally do need the guy. I care about you so much! I know exactly what you're goin through.. Ya Allah, why do I miss him so much today. Why can't I push him out of my mind like usually I did. Oh my dear Allah, I felt so sinful today. I felt so sinful because I let myself to think and  miss a man that is not my fated husband.

I know I had always been asking things form You Ya Allah but to whom else can I ask when You are the only Giver and the only Keeper.. To You only that I can ask for and to You only Ya Allah I lies my faith on... Erase him from my heart Ya Allah if he is not for me so that I won't miss him and won't continue on wanting him.. But if he is the one fated for me Ya Allah, give him guidance Ya Allah to see it back and lay for him the path to comes back to me.. I will love him following the path that you leads in the name of Islam and never to let myself love him like before and forgets my love for you Ya Allah.
I am scared of seeing the bad changes in him now Ya Allah.. Help him find the real him back Ya Allah.. The awesome magnificent him that I fall for before. The him that I once see as the perfect husband and father material..

Sincerely, servant of Allah

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